Seriously? *Another* Cybersecurity Certification

Right, so ISC2 – you know, the folks who think CCNA-level stuff is “expert” territory – have decided there’s a shortage of Digital Forensics and Incident Response (DFIR) people. Shocking. Absolutely fucking shocking. So naturally, their solution isn’t to pay people more or actually *train* them properly, it’s to churn out another goddamn certificate.

They’re launching the “CCDF” – Certified Cyber Defense Professional. It covers incident handling, investigation, and response. Big whoop. It’s aimed at mid-career folks with some existing security experience (because apparently entry-level people are just expected to *know* this stuff now). They’re even trying to get it recognized for CPE credits, because lord knows we don’t have enough ways to pay to prove we know things.

The whole thing reeks of desperation. They’re partnering with SANS (surprise, surprise – gotta monetize that training pipeline) and some other organizations to try and make this palatable. It’s basically a money grab disguised as workforce development. Expect vendor-specific bullshit crammed in there too, you just *know* it.

Honestly? More certifications don’t fix the problem. Practical experience does. But hey, who needs practical experience when you have a shiny new badge to slap on your LinkedIn profile, right?

Source: ISC2 Aims to Bridge DFIR Skill Gap with New Certificate

Speaking of DFIR, I once had a “certified” incident responder tell me they couldn’t analyze a memory dump because “it was too big for Excel.” Excel. Fucking *Excel*. That’s the level we’re dealing with here people. Don’t get your hopes up.

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