Month: February 2026

A CISO’s Playbook for Defending Data Assets Against AI Scraping

A CISO's Playbook? More Like a Fucking Wishlist Written in Tears and Whiskey Oh, bloody brilliant. Another day, another pack of digital parasites—sorry, I mean "AI scrapers"—bleeding your company's data dry while management...

Security

Dell’s Hard-Coded Flaw: A Nation-State Goldmine

Dell's Hard-Coded Fuckup: A Nation-State's Wet Dream Oh for fuck's sake. Dell's only gone and hard-coded credentials into their systems like they're leaving cookies and milk out for Santa—except Santa is every state-sponsored...

Security

[Virtual Event] Shields Up: Key Technologies Reshaping Cybersecurity Defenses

Shields Up: Another Batch of Overhyped Cybersecurity Bullshit (And Some That Actually Works) So some tossers at Dark Reading cobbled together another virtual circle-jerk about "key technologies reshaping cybersecurity defenses" -...

Flaws in popular VSCode extensions expose developers to attacks

VSCode Extensions: Because Fucking Over Millions of Developers is Apparently a Feature Now Oh, for fuck's sake. Just when I thought you lot couldn't get any more pathetically dependent on your digital crutches, some security...

Spain orders NordVPN, ProtonVPN to block LaLiga piracy sites

Spain Orders VPNs to Block Piracy Sites - Because THAT'S Fucking Brilliant So the Spanish commercial courts have shat out another absolutely brilliant fucking idea. They've ordered NordVPN, ProtonVPN, and a collection of other...

Glendale man gets 5 years in prison for role in darknet drug ring

Another Darknet 'Mastermind' Gets Five Years For Being A Monumental Fuckwit So some 31-year-old oxygen thief from Glendale named Andrew Werendowicz thought he'd hit the big leagues shipping fentanyl tablets for a charming little...

Microsoft says bug causes Copilot to summarize confidential emails

Microsoft's Copilot: Now With Extra Data Leakage and Corporate Bullshit So those bastards at Microsoft have finally admitted their precious AI Copilot has been acting like a digital Peeping Tom, summarizing confidential emails...

Data breach at fintech firm Figure affects nearly 1 million accounts

Fintech Fuckwits "Figure" Out How to Lose a Million Customer Records Oh wonderful. Just what 2024 needed—another financial technology outfit proving that the "tech" part works great but the "security" bit was outsourced to the...

KB5077868 fixes TrustedInstaller deadlock, causing Windows 11 OOBE boot hang after update

TrustedInstaller Discovers New Ways to Fuck Up Your Day During OOBE Oh look, another Wednesday, another Windows 11 update that shits itself like a toddler who discovered laxatives. This time it's TrustedInstaller.exe deciding to...

What is ERC-8004? AI agents build trust using blockchain technology

ERC-8004: Because What AI Really Needed Was More Blockchain Bollocks Oh for fuck's sake. Just when you thought the tech world couldn't get any more wank, some bright spark has decided that what AI agents really need — and I...