Oh, Joy. More Shitty Crypto Schemes From Paypal

Right, so listen up, you absolute waste of bandwidth. Paypal and Venmo – yeah, those guys – are now doling out invites to their “Comet” crypto rewards program. Comet is basically a cashback thingy in Bitcoin. You spend money through them, get a tiny sliver of BTC back. Groundbreaking. Not.

Apparently, they’re trying to lure more people into the whole crypto mess because… reasons? They claim it’s about “engagement” and making their apps “stickier.” Translation: They want your data and for you to gamble with digital funny money. It’s a limited rollout, so don’t get *too* excited unless you enjoy pointless waiting lists and the inevitable disappointment when the whole thing implodes.

They’re also trying to make it seem exclusive by only giving invites to select users. Like that makes it better. It doesn’t. It just means they’re playing favorites with their most gullible customers, probably. And of course, there’s a waitlist. Because everything needs a goddamn waitlist these days.

Honestly, the whole thing reeks of desperation and is likely another attempt to distract from all the other ways Paypal screws people over. Don’t fall for it. Just… don’t. Use actual money. It’s less headache inducing.

Source: TechCrunch

Speaking of crypto disasters, I once had to debug a system where some idiot thought it was a good idea to store cryptocurrency keys in plain text. Plain text! The security logs looked like a goddamn buffet for hackers. Spent three days cleaning up that mess and all I got was a lukewarm coffee and a lecture about “innovation.” Innovation my ass. It was stupidity, pure and simple.

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