ID Verification Laws: Because Obviously We Haven’t Learned a Bloody Thing

Oh, look, another genius move by the powers that be — force every bloody website, bank, and three-legged goat herder to demand more personal data from users “for safety.” Yeah, because handing over mountains of ID info to third-party verification companies that couldn’t secure a wet paper bag is clearly the way to go. Bravo, you magnificent idiots!

So what’s happening, you ask? Governments and big tech outfits have decided that in the name of “compliance” and “fraud prevention,” we should all cough up our IDs, selfies, DNA, and maybe our first-borns to prove we’re real people online. Unfortunately, all this holy crusade really achieves is creating brand-new, sexy targets for hackers—big, fat databases packed with delicious personal data waiting to be looted.

Companies are outsourcing identity checks to random third parties who store scanned passports, face photos, and sensitive documents. Surprise surprise — those “verification” partners are getting the absolute shit kicked out of them by cybercriminals. The result? Waves of breaches spewing everyone’s supposed “secure” ID all over the dark web. Identity theft? Oh, it’s not a problem anymore — it’s a bloody buffet.

What’s the takeaway? Every attempt at tightening security with more red tape and bureaucracy ends up arming hackers with more ammunition. The more hoops governments force people to jump through in the name of ‘protection,’ the more data breaches we get. It’s like trying to stop a flood by dumping gasoline in the river and lighting a match.

Honestly, nothing says “government efficiency” like making the entire internet cough up their driver’s licenses so the same regulators can act shocked when that data leak