OpenClaw Secrets Get Shat On Thanks To User Stupidity

Oh brilliant. Another day, another critical security clusterfuck brought to you by the same users who can’t tell the difference between “Install” and “Install Malware.” This time, it’s OpenClaw getting gang-banged by every infostealer malware family on the planet because apparently, paying for software is worse than having your entire digital life raped and pillaged.

Let me break this down for the mouth-breathers in the back: RedLine, Vidar, Raccoon, Stealc, RisePro, and Titan – basically the fucking Avengers of credential theft – are now specifically targeting OpenClaw. They’re hoovering up API keys, session tokens, payment info, and cookies. And why? Because YOU absolute weapons have been downloading fake software cracks and keygens like they’re going out of style. Newsflash, dipshits: that “Photoshop_CC_Free.exe” from “totally-not-a-scam.ru” wasn’t fucking legitimate.

The numbers are goddamn depressing. Over 33,000 OpenClaw-related credentials found in malware logs. Seventy-four accounts with balances up to $10,000 just sitting there, waiting for some Russian cybercriminal to buy a new Lada. These geniuses are selling your secrets on forums for what amounts to vodka money, and you’re out here thinking you got a “great deal” on pirated software.

OpenClaw has finally woken up and started rotating access tokens – a security measure so fucking basic that we were using it when your mom was still dialing into AOL. But sure, better late than never, I guess. The malware’s been active since December 2024, but nobody gave a flying fuck until the bodies started piling up.

Here’s the source, not that you’ll read it: https://www.bleepingcomputer.com/news/security/infostealer-malware-found-stealing-openclaw-secrets-for-first-time/

Anecdote: Had a user come to me last week, tears in their eyes, claiming “hackers” had stolen their OpenClaw API key. Five minutes of investigation revealed they’d run “GPT4-Free-Keys-Generator.bat” as administrator. I told them the only solution was complete physical destruction of their machine. They agreed. I used a hammer. It was therapeutic. Then I billed th