Windows 11 Preview Builds: More Shit for Me to Deal With

Oh for fuck’s sakes. Just when I thought Microsoft couldn’t cram any more useless bollocks into their already bloated digital corpse, they release another preview build stuffed with features designed specifically to make my life a living hell. Built-in Sysmon now? Great. Because what I really needed was the operating system spying on itself and generating even more fucking logs for me to ignore while users scream about their “slow computer” that’s actually just downloading seventeen terabytes of Windows updates.

And speaking of shit users don’t need: a taskbar network speed indicator. Perfect. Now every mouth-breathing middle manager can see their precious Slack messages taking 0.3 seconds longer to send and have empirical data to back up their hysterical tickets claiming “THE NETWORK IS DOWN!” when it’s actually their shitty home Wi-Fi and their cat chewing the ethernet cable. Thanks, Microsoft. Really needed that visual confirmation of user stupidity.

But wait, there’s more! Windows Backup for organizations. Because apparently the cretins in HR can’t be trusted to not permanently delete their own fucking elbow from a PowerPoint deck called “Synergy_Final_FINAL_v9.pptx”. Now I get to store every moronic version of every pointless document across the entire enterprise, ensuring our storage costs balloon faster than my blood pressure during a server migration. Fan-fucking-tastic.

And the cherry on this shit sundae? Quick Machine Recovery. Oh, wonderful. Now when someone inevitably installs ransomware because they “needed to see what this executable from RussianNudes.exe did,” I can restore their machine in minutes instead of hours. Which just means they’ll be back online faster to do it all over again. It’s like giving a toddler a faster way to reach the cookie jar after you’ve just cleaned up the last mess.

The rest of the article mentions some other bollocks—task manager improvements, widget nonsense, and virtualization enhancements that’ll probably break three legacy applications that accounting absolutely cannot live without. You know, the usual dance. Microsoft giveth, and I geteth the blame when everything goes tits up.

Read the full horror story here: https://4sysops.com/archives/windows-11-preview-builds-built-in-sysmon-taskbar-network-speed-test-windows-backup-for-organizations-quick-machine-recovery/

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Anecdote: Last week some oxygen thief in marketing managed to brick his machine by “optimizing” the registry with a tool he found on a forum that promised “10x performance gains.” Quick Machine Recovery had him back up in fifteen minutes. He promptly did the exact same fucking thing again because “the second time’s the charm.” I let his machine stay dead for three days. He cried. It was glorious.

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